Wednesday, June 30, 2010

From Blush Queen to Erotic Romance Writer

When reading a great story about another author’s blush meter, I got a good laugh as when I was growing up, I was known as the blush queen. It wouldn’t take me much to get me to a number 10 on that author’s 'Blush-O-Meter' scale when I was younger. LOL! I think I’m the only high school senior in my state to be photographed with the then President Gerald Ford who could compete with the sun. It has it good and bad points. 

That story also reminded me of some other times in my life when the 'Blush-O-Meter' would have been a fun thing to have. Or NOT! LOL!

The first one was when I was asked to bring my very first completed book to a college gang party. These were the people I had learned to become an adult with and I had a lot of apprehension. These people had embarrassed me and held me when I cried or when I was sick. There were many good and bad memories with these folks.

I told the DH, Gordon, and he convinced me it was all good. But as we got closer to the party, the more trepidation I was feeling.

Once there, the manuscript was being handed around and then I started getting comments like, 'great job' and 'I've never know anyone who completed a whole book before' and then I saw one of my old college boyfriends reading it.

He walked up to me and stated, "You know if you'd done that to me, maybe we'd still be together."

I could feel my face turning warm and I had to be very careful here. If I said the wrong thing, he’d think I still liked him or something. "Maybe I would have if you deserved that type of treatment."

"Gordon must be a very lucky man." He walked away as the DH walked up.

"What's wrong with him?" DH asks.

"He got to the love scene."


"He said you were a lucky guy."

"He did." DH puffs up and says, "I think I'll go talk to the guys."

The college girl friends came up. "What's up with the guys? And how about you…you’re blushing!"

"They're all talking about the love scene."

"No wonder you’re blushing!"

I looked at them and arched a brow. "Maybe I should remind all of your husbands, we all went to college together. After all I didn’t win a knockwurst contest." Every other woman at the party had a face redder than mine. LOL! Revenge is soooo sweet!

The next big time that I can remember me really, really blushing was when I wrote my first BDSM story about six years ago now. It was also the last time that I can remember me having that particular affliction. I had to do a lot of what I considered covert research as I prepared to write this story of a woman's darkest fantasies. Finally, I got the courage to just sit down and get it done. The whole day, I would write a sentence and get up to pace, wondering what I was doing since I knew nothing of that world. Still, I plugged away at it until I eventually got it right. It was the first thing I sold to eXtasy books. I was really surprised.

But half way into the process, my husband shocked me by showing up in my office. My face went from zero to RED in the span of less than 10 seconds.

"Something wrong?"

"No, why are you asking?"

He gives me his quirky smile and says, "There are only a few times I’ve ever seen you blush in twenty years."

I sat still. "Really?"

"Yeah. It’s mainly when I caught you doing something you shouldn’t and when you’re thinking about sex."

I gasped. "What makes you think I’m doing something I shouldn’t? I’m an adult."

"With an antiquated idea about sex sometimes. If you’re going to really be an erotic romance writer, you have some changing to do." He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. "I’m sure that practice will help!"

I roll my eyes and tell him nothing is going to happen until I finish this story.

That very day, my whole attitude changed. I wasn’t ashamed of my writing at all. It was just that I was brought up in the Bible belt and as anyone who has grown up there knows, the fear of God and sex can be pounded into you from the moment you walk. And lordy, the brimstone…LOL! There is absolutely nothing wrong with sex. It’s a natural thing and we have such a backward sexual outlook in America that it took some retraining on my part to not let it worry me at all. Now, I barely bat an eye. There's a private me and a writer me.

I advertise my very sexy books all the time and I do write to every heat level as the story dictates. I am passionate about all my books as every author should be. If you’re embarrassed about it, you don’t need to be writing it at all. I write what I love and nothing compromises that position. Sometimes my characters want the full Monty and others, they want it very sweet.

Now it’s my DH’s turn to blush every time he drives my car. My license plate says ERWRTER and he’s been asked many times what it means. I'll show you all a picture sometime. He tells them the truth…it means…Erotic Romance Writer. The moment he tells the women, they get a gleam in their eye and say ‘Ah’ while the men just shake their heads and walk away, knowing they wouldn’t be caught dead in my car.

See you all tomorrow!



  1. You must have a lucky husband if you try some of the stuff out first.


  2. Doesn't he wish?!? LOL!

    I've never been a pretzel but in my younger years, I was a little adventurous. Besides, when you're married anything is allowed in the bedroom as far as I'm concerned.

    Thanks for stopping by, Stacey!


  3. I agree Lynn, anything that goes on between husband and wife is perfectly okay as far as I'm concerned. I wonder ho many times an Author is asked "do you practice with your husband first? lol lol
    Carol L.

  4. My husband wishes I was your character lol

  5. I can relate to your early blushing years. I used to be a "blusher" also, and I hated it. Can't tell you the last time I blushed, but it would have been over something that made me feel stupid, like something I should have known that someone else called me on. It would take a lot to make me blush over something sexual. On that subject, I believe I can hang with the best of them. Lol.

  6. Carol,

    It was that very question one day and the other author's blog which prompted me to write this one.

    I had a question in a workshop once where I was asked if I practiced every thing I preached. At first I didn't know what to say and finally got out the 'I'm not a pretzel' quote. Some of those women are incredibly flexible or can stand being in uncomfortable positions for a long time.

    Frankly, it goes back to where the line is drawn and my bedroom door is one of them. LOL!

    Thanks for stopping by.


  7. Margaret,

    My DH will get a kick out of that because he wishes I were some of my characters as well. LMAO!

    Thanks for stopping by!


  8. Diane,

    It's good to know that I'm in good company.

    Everything used to make me blush and I mean everything. Like when in high school if I wasn't paying attention to the teacher and get called on, I would blush. In college, if I was caught doing something I shouldn't, I would blush. And those sexual discussions, boy, it took me at least 5 minutes before the blushing stopped.

    And while I don't blush any more, I do feel the blood draining from my face quite often. LOL!

    Thanks for stopping by!


  9. Well..some of us never stop blushing..I am 63 years old, mom to four, grandma and great grandma and I still blush. Yes..I get teased about it too. susan L.

  10. I still blush. It's horrible. They tease me at work about it especially when I lend some of my books out. Be proud of what you do. When I started to review books I decided to use my real name. I'm not ashamed of what I read or my opinion of them. Why should I use an alias? I may blush but I'm proud enough to put my name on my "product".